Artism Autism: Our Trip to New York City

Last week was a fun, busy, and exciting week for our family. 

My son, Bryce Merlin's, artwork was accepted into the Artism Autism show at the Soho Gallery for Digital Arts, curated by Debra Hosseini. 

Artwork by many artists (from several countries) was included in the show. My husband, Mark, and I were happy to have the opportunity to drive to New York City and stay for several days. Jesse joined us, arriving from Philadelphia, so it was a family time as well. As Bryce's last (and only other) trip to NYC occurred on September 9 - 12, 2001 (see past blog post), it was extra sweet to take him there once again. (I had been back twice, in 2002 with Jesse and 2009 with Mark.)

Below is Bryce's self-portait, one of his two drawings accepted into the show.  

Bryce is very interested in hair styles and often braids his hair. For a long time, he has wanted to have his hair professionally braided. So, as a special surprise, he and I went to Attractions Hair Salon in Athens the day before our trip and Vanessa braided Bryce's hair. She took great care and we were amazed at how even and perfect Bryce's braids looked when she finished, about an hour and a half later!

We celebrated by going to the diner across the street from the hair salon for lunch. 

Later in the day we took Farley, Tyler, Jackie and Gracie to the vet's for boarding. Bryce got to see where our three dogs and one parrot stay when we are out of town and the good care they receive at "doggy camp."


The next morning (a Wednesday) Bryce, Mark and I left Athens about 7:30 a.m. for New York City. It was a cool, rainy day. It rained most of the way through Pennsylvania. But finally, about 7 p.m., just after dark, we arrived in NYC. Here is a photo of the Lincoln Tunnel. I have a bit of claustrophobia and taking photos helps to keep my mind off being in a tunnel! (Taken using the Hipstamatic app for iPhone.)

For some reason it took us twelve hours to drive from Athens to NYC. We had gone through a lot of heavy rain and made a few stops; and when we arrived on the outskirts of the city the traffic getting into the Lincoln Tunnel was really backed up. When we finally arrived in the city my mind felt a bit like the photo below!

But, I got a second wind and started see what I could take a photo of out the car window as Mark drove to the hotel. 


I thought it would be very unusual to have the following scene be one's school crossing. Where we live there are more deer crossings than school crossings.

Bryce loves the lights and signs and energy of New York City.

We arrived at Hotel Elysee and had dinner at Cellini Restaurant. Bryce discovered he likes veal parmesan, having had a sample of Mark's dinner. His own choice was spaghetti and meatballs. 

After a good night's sleep in our suite, we had breakfast at the hotel and then left on our first adventure... to see the Statue of Liberty. Ten years ago, on September 11, 2001, Bryce asked to see "the most beautiful lady in America" but our plans to see the statue from the observation area at the top of the World Trade Center were not to be. Now, at last, Bryce would see Lady Liberty for himself.

But first, Bryce's first ever ride in a taxi.

There was a very long line waiting to get on the ferry. It was still raining and was also cold. Umbrellas were everywhere as we waited in a serpentine line and then went through security, an example of organized chaos as potential visitors removed belts, jewelry, cell phones and all manner of metal from their persons and made their way through metal detectors. Whew! I was glad to be through that.

Once on the ferry, Bryce pointed out that it was his first ever ride on a big boat where you could feel the rocking motion. He looked a bit worried at first, but was A-OK. I was glad I'd brought the plastic poncho that had been in my car's glove compartment for, well, for the last two cars I've owned. I had brought it along and we covered the wet seat with it and were able to sit down. We were on the top of the three-deck ferry.

Here she is, coming into view!

Even with the rain and the cold and the mist, she was magnificent! As it turned out, the next day, October 28, 2011, was the Statue of Liberty's 125th birthday.

After our ferry ride, we were ready for hot coffee and lunch. So it was back into a taxi and on to Katz's Delicatessen. Mark has been to New York many times and knows the best places to eat!

Bryce ordered a soft salami sandwich with Swiss cheese. He liked it when the owner stopped by, asked where we were from, and explained that the deli had been founded in 1888.

Bryce noticed the salami hanging on the wall and thought we should purchase one to bring home for our Pekingese, Tyler. I told him we couldn't but that he could take a photo of the salami, so I handed him my camera and here is the result...

We knew that Jesse would be arriving soon, so called and asked him if we could bring a sandwich back to the hotel for him too. While it was being made, Bryce and I enjoyed splitting a piece of New York cheesecake. Yummy!

It was wonderful to see Jesse! We had a good visit, a rest and shower and then it was off to the Soho Gallery for Digital Arts. Here is a photo of Jesse and Bryce outside the entrance. The sign says "ARS Spectrum: The Artistic Autistic." It was to be a four-day event, though we were only able to stay for two days. The artwork will be up until November 5th.

Inside the gallery we saw the many large video screens which displayed artwork in a rotating fashion; about every several minutes a new piece of art would appear on the screen. Most of the works (prints) were priced at $95, with half going to the artist and half going to benefit a school for children with autism. John Ordover is the owner of the gallery.

Debra Hosseini and Bryce at the opening night of the Artism Autism show at the SoHo Gallery for Digital Arts. Debra is also the author of "The Art of Autism" (see cover below), which is available on Amazon or from www.artismtoday.com. A second edition of the book will be available soon and some of Bryce's work will be included!

FYI: Debra's son, Kevin Hosseini is a prolific painter who has been featured in film, newspaper and art books. His art is on display in many venues across the United States. In April 2011, Kevin was part of a 

Neurodiversity Exhibit at the Museum of Modern Art of the Ukraine. 

The photo below shows another work of Bryce's that appeared in the show. The gallery walls were white, but the lighting was subdued and I did not use a flash.

The photo below is of Bryce and his stepdad, Mark Williams.

Here is Bryce's self-portrait in the show.

Here is Joel Anderson's drawing of the Statue of Liberty.

After the show, we went to Gallagher's NY Prime Steakhouse. Here is a whole lot of steak, aging...

It was great being together at the restaurant, but our meal would have been more enjoyable if we hadn't been seated next to a large party of businessmen (and one woman) celebrating some event with many toasts and loud talking and laughing as they yelled from one end of the long table to another. (sigh) It was hard for me to hear, for us to hear, and I imagine also for Bryce as he wears a hearing aid that makes all sound come in at the same level. 


Here are the staff… Gallagher's has been around since 1927 and the walls are covered with photographs.

Here is Jesse in the photo below; it was wonderful being together. (Jesse is the developer for Sidecar and is also on the continuing education faculty of Moore College of Art & Design and has been active in the Philly music scene as a DJ for several years and as a founding member of Stakeout Music.)

Below is a photo taken that evening after dinner, and you can see it is still cloudy and rainy.

We returned to our hotel and watched exciting Game 6 of the World Series.

The next day, Friday, we headed off to see the de Kooning exhibit at the Museum of Modern Art. Bryce was able to see the de Kooning exhibit and the wonderful, expressive colors, lines and shapes within his work. It was tiring for him, though, and Mark sat with him in view of Andrew Wyeth's Christina's World, while Jesse and I explored the fifth floor galleries.

It was wonderful to walk with Jesse through rooms full of famous paintings I'd previously seen only in books and prints: Picasso, Leger, Hopper, Wyeth, Van Gogh…

We only touched the surface of the masterpieces there for all to see. It was bittersweet to walk out when part of me wanted to stay there all day just taking it all in. But I told myself MoMa will be there when I return for a more leisurely stroll through her many wonderful galleries. If you'd like to explore the museum, but can't make it to New York, check out this link for a virtual tour.

For lunch, Mark took us to a wonderful restaurant, Papillon. Bryce enjoyed a big bowl of macaroni and cheese and I caught his Impressionistic-like reflection in a foiled mirror. The white lines at the top are fake spider webs, which were part of the decorations for Halloween.

After lunch, we returned to the hotel for a rest, then made our way to SoHo for dinner and a performance event at SGDA gallery. 

We had a lovely dinner at Blue Ribbon. The table was small for the four of us, but the service, atmosphere, and food were all wonderful. Bryce enjoyed the ribs and chicken wing appetizers that he was able to grill over a flame right at the table. I loved the Shrimp Provencal. (Here's their menu.)

"Brothers, chefs and restaurateurs Bruce and Eric  Bromberg have set culinary trends and ignited passions for almost 20 years, most notably as founders and guiding forces behind the Blue Ribbon Restaurants Group. In their early twenties, Bruce and Eric Bromberg each attended Le Cordon Bleu in Paris, graduating with the highest honors with Eric holding the distinction of being the first American to teach classes at the prestigious school."

After dinner, we walked down the street to the gallery. Keri Bowers of Normal Films (co-director with Taylor Cross of the film "Normal People Scare Me") organizes performances by talented children and adults on the autism spectrum. We went downstairs in the gallery to a performance area and were happy to have the opportunity to see talents beyond visual arts as folks on the autism spectrum performed. There were comedians, pianists, singers… Sybelle Silverphoenix sang "Bad Reputation"; Taylor Cross performed a wonderful monologue. Amy Gravino (who you will see in the film link above) recently attained her master's degree, and she read a short story about a first french kiss. It was an outstanding piece of writing. In the film (from a few years ago) she stated she wanted to be a writer… Amy, you really are a very good writer! Tom Ryan played the guitar and sang two original songs: the first was called "The Hard Way." The second, I didn't catch the title, but as Mark pointed out later, if it was professionally produced it would be at the top of the charts. I agree!

The sound system was challenging and there were more people than chairs, but the latter is a good thing and I'm sure the former will be improved upon. I had tears in my eyes more than once and when I looked at Bryce he was intently watching and listening to everything. 

We returned to our hotel with many happy memories of the day and evening…and to watch the last game in the World Series before heading off to dreamland and the next day's drive back to Ohio. But first, a word from the meteorologist. A BIG  SNOW STORM was headed our way! We said our goodbyes to Jesse (sigh and sniffle on my part) and the next morning quickly packed up and headed out. Leaving New York City was easier than getting in had been a few days earlier, and soon we were in New Jersey and then Pennsylvania and here is what it looked like on our drive through Pennsylvania.

When one has their own business, albeit a small business (Lucky Press), snafus come up even while you're on vacation. That's why iPhones and iPads were invented. I was able to check email, check problems on Amazon, check in with an anxious author who was looking forward to a Nov. 1st book launch and finding Amazon had the wrong cover image up!… I was able to check the GPS to see where on the PA turnpike our car was… and able to take the photo below and upload it to Facebook. (I was doing all these fun things while Mark was driving. He's from Cleveland and is not fazed by snowy weather. I, on the other hand, spent 17 years in Florida and am not happy to drive in the snow.)

Are you curious about Lucky Press's book launch, which takes place TODAY? Here is a link for more information on Jessica Bell's wonderful book (and accompanying CD soundtrack), String Bridge.

We were happy to enter Ohio and find the sun shining through clouds, the trees in the last glorious colors of autumn and a light rain starting as we made our way to Marietta where we stopped for dinner. Then it was past the lights of various power plants on Rt 7 as we headed to Athens. Of course, as soon as we were near our fair city, home of Ohio University, we noticed several police cars pulling people over… Lucky for me (as I was now driving) I was utilizing the cruise control feature on Mark's car!

MORE INFORMATION:

• The Art of Autism Exhibit will run from November 4 – 6 at the Good Purpose Gallery in Lee, Massachusetts. (Click here for more information.)
• Friend Bryce Merlin, artist, on Facebook.
• See Bryce's work on T-shirts and more at Cafe Press.
• Friend Appalachian Morning on Facebook.
• Friend Keri Bowers on Facebook.
• Friend The Art of Autism on Facebook.
• Friend the SoHo Gallery for Digital Arts on Facebook.
• Friend Kevin Hosseini on Facebook.
• Subscribe to Appalachian Morning Creativity Blog

Dancing after September 11th

This will be an unusually short post for me today because I have to go out and about and do a lot of things, some responsible things, a few fun things, and along with those activities will come the process of remembering and giving thanks for life.

It is important to honor those who died on September 11th; to remember them, to mourn them, to celebrate them. I did not lose a loved one on 9/11. I can only muse on our family's luck that day, the thankfulness I feel for the decade since, and the empathy I feel for those who must think 9/11 was both "last week" and a lifetime ago.

I was in NYC on 9/11 with my sister, Joan Phelps, and my son, Bryce. You can read a post I wrote about that day AT THIS LINK.

When Osama bin Laden was found and killed this year, I thought more about those who died on 9/11. The blogpost I wrote this past May on that event "Justice on May 1" is AT THIS LINK.

The photo above was taken on Sept. 9, 2001. Bryce is looking at a souvenir he's just bought and Joan is in the photo too. We had gone to NYC to meet with Publisher's Weekly and to see Michael Jackson's 30th anniversary concert on 9/10. The concert was incredible and you can get a sense of the sounds and excitement at this YouTube clip.

Here is Bryce earlier in the day, on 9/10/01 in Central Park.

A week after 9/11, we were back in Ohio and the nursing home where Bryce lives has an annual Sept. family cook-out with an Elvis impersonator. Joan and I were there and in 10 days we'd gone from Michael Jackson in Madison Square Garden to the sorrow and shock of 9/11 to a week of nonstop terror attack coverage to a small parking lot in Ohio where we were invited to dance. We did and this photo captures that moment.



This week a wonderful opportunity arose for Bryce; 4 of his drawings have been accepted into a show on The Art of Autism in the Soho Gallery of Digital Arts in NYC on October 27, 2011 and running for 3 weeks. We are taking him there, his second trip to NYC, and so different than our first. I'm going to visit him today and tell him about the show, about our upcoming trip, about how life holds suffering and sadness but also joy and surprise and love. (I will post more about this event soon.)

As you move through the coming days, if sorrow wraps itself around your heart, I hope you will be able to come through the other side of that sorrow and find a sprout of happiness that can grow within you to become a future that will honor life and those who now exist only through our choices and memories.

Justice on May 1, 2011

Last night, as this early riser struggled to stay awake long enough to see the Phillies beat the Mets... (no, they did not, but if the other team has to win once in a while, then it seems fitting a NY team would win last night)... the news of Osama Bin Laden's death broke into our bedroom here in southern Ohio and shocked me from near sleep. "At last...," I thought. As I closed my eyes to sleep a while later I knew I would call my son, Bryce, the next day to let him know. For Bryce, a special needs adult, was with me and my sister, Joan, in NYC on 9/11. We were to be in the World Trade Center that morning. We slept in. (Here is a blog post about that day.) And didn't this news bring in me, as I slept and as I woke and padded to the coffee maker, a flood of emotions and memories.

I think of: Laura Gilly, a flight attendant for 9 years who quite her job to work for Cantor Fitzgerald. she was only 32. And Louis Modafferi, the captain who led Staten Island's Rescue 5 and worked on a federal rescue team. And Andrew Golkin, 30. 750 people attended his memorial service. My heart remembers the names of Lisa Egan and Samantha Egan, sisters who worked at Cantor Fitzgerald and Patrick Sean Murphy, 36, who loved his family, basketball, and fishing. He had 2 children, Maggie, 2, and Sean, 4.

This morning, I must not think of my fear and worry that day, the way my mind imagined rushing down a crowded stairway pulling my slow-walking son behind me. I must remember Wendy Faulkner, a v.p. at Aon who lived in Mason, Ohio, and known for her generosity and caring. Her family established a nonprofit group to continue her legacy of helping children in the Third World. Margaret Quinn Orloske was a "born organizer" and "American History Buff." She traveled 2.5 hrs. each way to her job as v.p. at Marsh & McLennan. Her friend is quoted in the NYT as saying "No matter what she did, she did it well."

Please remember with me Stanley McCaskill, 47, who lived with his mother in the house he was born in. He checked in with her every day from his job as a security guide at 1 WTC. My heart aches for what she must have felt that day. Thomas E. Jurgens, 26, was "one of 3 court officers who disappeared while helping victims." Gayle Greene, 51, shared a family name with me; I wonder if we were related in any way. She loved Christmas decorations. She also worked in the WTC.

Marion Britton, Donald and Jean Peterson, Toshiya Kuge, and Edward Felt were among those killed on Flight 93. Mari-Rae Sopper, Ada Mason, Chortz Ghee, Eddie Dillard, and Lacey Ivory were among those killed at the Pentagon.

I want to say their names.

I know that children died, babies newborn and unborn died. Grandpas and new fathers, pregnant women and little girls. Average Americans and foreigners. Workers and retirees. Firefighters and police officers. Receptionists and vice presidents. Flight attendants, pilots, and teenagers. Young folks like my youngest son, so full of promise and just at the start of their wonderful lives.*

Nearly 3,000 people died that day or afterward as a direct result of the attacks on 9/11. (I am not counting the terrorists.) 1,461 U.S. troops have died in Afghanistan. 4,424 U.S. troops have died in Iraq.


Other wars have cost us the following:

294 U.S. troops died in the Gulf War.
58,245 U.S. Armed Forces died in the Vietnam War.
618,000 U.S. citizens died in the Civil War.
117,465 U.S. citizens died in World War One.
418,500 U.S. citizens died in World War Two.

For many years, I was a member of a Christian church that embraced pacifism. It is impossible for me to raise my fist and say "Yes!" at news of a death of a human being without feeling a twinge of guilt, followed by embarrassment that such a conflict exists in me; in some ways I feel weak. I want the confidence to be able, were the situation to arise, to shoot someone who kills or attempts to kill someone I love. I know I would be able to do it. I know I would never be the same afterward.

To those troops who found and killed Osama Bin Laden, I will do the most forthright thing I can this morning and say, "Thank you." Thank you for doing something I cannot do myself.

My hope for the future is that extremism in any form, in any religion, in any politics, will one day give way to cooperation and dialogue. We must have hope and ideals and things to strive for. But today, this morning, I'm glad to tell my son, who breathed the ashen air on September 11, 2001, that "the bad guy who planned the whole thing" is dead.
_____________________________________________
*Some information in this post was found in Portraits: 9/11/01, The Collected Portraits of Grief from the New York Times, (Times Books, Henry Holt and Company, New York, 2002). A few times a year I pull this book off a shelf and imagine my name, and my son's and sister's names there. And feel sorrow. And give thanks.

Our Time in NYC-- September 11th

It is cool here today in the Appalachian Foothills. I wore a sweater this morning, but now in the afternoon the sun is bright and the sky is blue and clear. There is something about the blue sky this time of year that I associate with the events of September 11, 2001, because the sky was so blue that day above the skyscrapers.

My sister Joan E. Phelps, my son Bryce Merlin, and I were in the city, having arrived by car from Ohio Sunday night, Sept. 9th. On Monday we visited Central Park (see photo with Joan and Bryce below) and went shopping. That evening we saw Michael Jackson's 30th anniversary concert.

We were exhausted and excited afterward and I was afraid I wouldn't sleep, so I took a Tylenol PM. The last thought I had before closing my eyes was that we'd catch the subway and go down to the World Trade Center first thing in the morning, around 8. We'd go up to the observation deck and show Bryce the Statue of Liberty. His father and I had been there before he was born, and I remembered the fantastic views. Bryce called the statue "the most beautiful woman in America" and I knew he would love the sights from the WTC.



That afternoon, Joan and I had an appointment at Publisher's Weekly. This was a big deal for Lucky Press, the publishing company I'd founded and Joan helped me to launch. We were from Ohio and this was only the second time I'd been in NYC.

(Photo: Bryce Merlin on the steps of the Parks building in Central Park)

Usually, Bryce and I wake up at 6:30 or 7:00. Invariably. But not this Tuesday morning. Bryce walked from his small adjoining room to my bedside. "Aren't you going to wake up, Mom?" he asked. I looked at the clock: 8:52 a.m. I couldn't believe it. The times I've slept past 8:30 a.m. I could count on one hand.

Joan woke up too and while I was in the bathroom she clicked on the TV. And then, well, you know... When the second plane hit, I sat on the bed stunned. How far away were we from the site? Should we close the windows we'd opened to let in the fresh air? What was happening?

We explained to Bryce, who has mental and physical challenges, that we would not be able to go to the World Trade Center, but that we would eat breakfast near the hotel. I didn't want to frighten him, but wanted him to know something sad and serious had happened ... was happening.

I took Bryce across the street for bagels and juice. Upon our return, Joan told us about the Pentagon. We took a walk after breakfast; the streets were so quiet. I will never forget the sound, the light, the sky, and the bus that drove up from the site, filled with people who looked dazed and dusty.


We stayed one more night and left in the morning. I'll never forget the site from the bridge, of the smoke and of the endless stream of traffic waiting for permission to enter the city. I'll never forget any of it; but someday I will be old, I will be dead, and 9/11 will be a story that people tell their grandchildren. There will be a monument, but no one will be alive who was there on that day. We will all join those who died. Life will go on without us. Will the buildings, the trees, the sky hold the memory of us at all?




There is nothing unusual in my story. I know that. There is nothing unique in my feelings or thoughts. I am part of a whole and yet alone too. When I returned home, I didn't want to sit at my desk in my home office and work ten hours a day, six days a week, any longer. I was more aware of what doesn't last.


I bought the book of all the obituaries of those who died: Portraits 9/11/01 (New York Times). I still have it, and for me it was very healing to read about these people. Their lives, their wonderful lives, lost. I mourned for them and realized my own story is pretty small, and my own life still needs a lot of work; but there is no guarantee I will have time to do the work that needs to be done within my mind and heart; the creation that is my life.


In the first few days back home as I watched TV obsessively I kept imagining being on a staircase with Bryce urging him to go faster, run! Run! I'm overweight and he is ungainly and his hearing aides would have clogged up... how frightening it would have been. Eventually I stopped worrying about something that never happened.



(Photo of Joan E. Phelps in front of "Lucky" sign, taken 9/9/10)

I don't believe "God spared me," for that means he didn't spare someone else. I believe in luck and in lack of luck, in coincidence, in being in the wrong place at the wrong time. And then what we do with all that, and all that happens in the spaces of narrowly missing death or tragedy, that is where we find important lessons, if we can calm our pounding hearts long enough to pay attention.

A few years after 9/11, on Dec. 31, 2006, I had a much closer call with death. It wasn't a few miles away then, it was right there when I experienced a severe allergic reaction to CT dye in a hospital ER. I was more prepared for the sense of mortality this time.


Three months later, I met a wonderful man. We were married, moved to a great town, bought a house. Since 2001, I've written 2 books, published the work of other authors, and Mark has written 3 books as well. Joan has retired to Florida. Bryce has started working in a sheltered workshop and has had a girlfriend for 6 years now. My son Jesse has graduated from college, started a promising career and met a wonderful girl. My mother is a lovely healthy senior citizen; I've met so many wonderful writers in my work, illustrated two kids books, and gone on two cruises. I've done so much since 2001. I've returned to NYC twice: once with Jesse and once with Mark.

I feel so sad for those families who are missing their loved ones today, and every day since then. May God bless you with comfort, love and peace.